Happiness is..

Welp, Once again i have succumbed to a blogging hiatus. Life these days is (as always) completely exhausting and full of surprises.

Since my last post, the mini-me has decided that she wanted to sit up, crawl, and devour a bowl of mashed avocados. All at the beginning of the five month mark. I am thrilled. Watching her grow is both amazing and bitter-sweet.  But, damn it, I thought I had a bit more time with my sweet, yet immobile baby. Time moves too fast..




Stanley park

Saturday was a gorgeous day so we decided to head to Stanley park.


Bright blue skies through the open tree tops..


I like to trail behind.. so much to see when you take a closer look..


The park Rangers’ tower.


Archway down the frozen path..


A breath of fresh air on a Sunday morning.


Maybe a hint of spring under the blanket of white..


Found some friends along the way..


And a single white swan swam among them.


Beautiful birds, wandering along.

Hope your weekend was beautiful.

My life according to the Beatles.

Using only SONG NAMES from ONE ARTIST, cleverly answer these questions.. ( I picked the Beatles because there are so many songs to choose from… some answers were hard to pick!)

Pick Your Artist : The Beatles

Are you a male or female? She’s a Woman

Describe yourself: I am the Walrus

How do you feel? Free as a Bird

Describe where you currently live:  Yellow Submarine

If you could go anywhere, where would you go? Octopus’s Garden

Your favorite form of transportation: Drive my Car

Your best friend is:  Lovely Rita

You and your best friends are: Just Happy to Dance with You

Favorite time of day: A Hard Day’s Night.

If your life was a TV show, what would it be called? The continuing story of Bungalo Bill.

What is life to you? Real Love.

Your fear: Badboy

What is the best advice you have to give? Let it Be.

Thought for the Day: Happiness is a Warm Gun

how I would like to die:  The End.

My soul’s present condition: I’m So Tired.

My motto: Ob-la-di-ob-la-da

Your favorite color is: Strawberryfields Forever

If you could change your name, what would it be? Sexy Sadie

Something you are looking forward to:  Watching Rainbows

I have no idea how to post a link-up but i’d love to see what you all come up with!

Friday Randomness.

Happy Friday everyone! I might have been a bit too quick to judge mother nature on that last post. There is a sign of a thaw coming. I can see it.. Those of you in the greater Springfield area might have even noticed a bit of gidiness in Nick Morganelli’s voice as he announced this might be end of the arctic chill. All I can think about is tiny little flower buds on trees, farmers markets, pastel colors, and windows WIDE open clearing out the stuffiness of months passed. I’m so excited I can almost taste the Benedryl.

It’s time to switch from Merlot to Sauvignon Blanc. Soon i’ll be busting out the flip flops and charcoal grill, and strapping on the running shoes and breathing in some fresh air. ahhhhhh


I have discovered the best gingerale on the planet. It’s amazing. Anyone that knows me, knows I am really not a soda drinker. Never have been.. If i am going to indulge, it’s going to be a really good quality cream soda, root beer, or gingerale..( or a Sprite from the fountain if i’m hungover.shhhh)This stuff is awesome. They come in small 7oz bottles and have no icky ingredients. Just spring water, cane sugar and real ginger. yum. I wish i had found this stuff while I was pregnant because i was so completely addicted to everything ginger.

Image (can you tell i’ve been having a bit too much fun with my Galaxy Note3?)

//Tomorrow I have an appointment to get my hair done. Normally this would be no big deal but it’s also the first time that i’ll be spending any amount of time away from the mini-me in the entire four and a half months since she’s been born. Baby steps.
Then we’re going out all together and mommy’s going shopping for a much needed wardrobe update. Everything i own currently is some shade of black or brown, i need to add some color and lose the sweats. fuck the winter. i’m over it.

maybe something like this.

Happy weekend. How ready are you for this season to be O-V-E-R?!

30 by 30 part deux

Let me start by saying that the last few weeks have been a little rough
Winter presses on. no sign of a thaw any time soon. If i don’t feel some sunshine, i might actually lose it.

About a month ago, i started a 30 by 30 “bucket list” and have since had ideas percolating, and then I trie to squeeze a few gems out of dear husband’s brain when I felt like i mentally hit a brick wall (which, these days happens more than i’d like to admit. Hence my blogging hiatus.) I’ve also been fumbling with my new phone (Galaxy Note 3), which is a little ridiculous and i feel like i’m using a banana phone. It has a better photo taking capability than my last, which was the selling point.. Anywho. moving on.



17. take belly dancing classes.
18. Visit the town where I grew up, show the family where i grew up.
19. Read my way through the classics section at Barnes & Noble… or Kindle.
20.  Successfully plant and maintain an herb garden (this also has much to do with our tiny little apartment life, and space is always an issue, but I want to make a point this year to actually get some type of indoor system going. I will not fail this time.. but more on that later.)
21. Put together a cookbook of family recipes.
22. Plan our 5 (and by 30, our 10 year) anniversary getaway
23. Build our scrap book
24. Tour a local brewery
25. Visit NYC
26. Dress up and go to a Renn faire
27. conquer my fear of and master the art of makeup..
28. cross a couple things off my DIY list on pinterest.
29. get a (small) spur of the moment tattoo
30.  (and this is more of an immediate goal but..) rediscover my inner fitness lover… and maybe run a 5k

Okay! Hello again to everyone out the in blog-land. My apologies. Blogging’s a little slow this week. It’s been a little hectic around here,  trying to stay active (at least mentally) while i am STILL housebound during the onslaught of all this white stuff. ick. Aaaanywho. This week we have solidified plans for a family gathering in March. My mother-in-law, Grandmother-in-law and Step daughter are all going to be cramming into our tiny little New england apartment for 5 (count em) FIVE whole days. Yep. that’s FOUR grown adults, 2 wee-ones in a small two bedroom. This. Could. Get. Interesting.

And deeeennnn.. My mom comes out in April for my Grandfather’s 90th! She will be here only for a few days, but it’s going to be a lot of back to back family time. Whew!

I’m still trying to get up the guts to post pictures of my Befores, and take you all on this post-baby weight loss journey. okay okay, i’m putting it out there, i’m still extremely self conscious. But i’m coming along and doing what i can. a bit at a time. I’ve seen so many inspiring ladies go through their transformations, and damnit i wanna be a part of it.

This blog is still under construction. I’m always trying to work out the kinks, get the creases out and solidify my tiny little corner of the blogosphere. This shiz is HARD.


This week I have also tried to get my facebook page up and running based on the app SmileMOM. Just a quick way for other ladies to talk and share and get to know one another. Blogging. is. exhausting.

It’s also Wednesday.. SO you know what that means..
Hump along with kathy at  Vodka and Soda!

I will confess..
-I don’t like Walking Dead. Or Game of Thrones. Or Breaking Bad. THERE. i said it. I’m sorry. i just don’t get the obsession. So sue .me 😉
-I’m feeling a little braindead lately. Part of me just wants to lock myself in a library and re-boot. but that would be crazy and rediculous.
-I REALLY SUCK at following a work out regimine. I break promises to myself all the time. Since it’s so cold (and i have an infant) Ive been trying to do yoga/pilates(blolgilates) but shit.. I just can’t keep my shit together. wah.

Humpday confessions!


Imagetoday I am linking up with Kathy from Vodka and Soda . fantastic blog. check it out.

//1 Okay my first little confession is going to come across as me being a snarky heinous bitch. but. that’s just how it goes. 
But really.( I’ve seen alot of this lately..) I love watching my preggo acquaintances/friends go on an on about how “as soon as i have this baby”  yadda yadda yadda. Guess what! NOT GONNA HAPPEN. You can kid yourself allllll you want about “losing 60lbs in 4 months” or running that 5k 3-4 months after popping it out.. but seriously chica? the only thing you’re going to be focused on is that kid. Knock that shit off, you’re making the rest of us look bad.
This is where i pat myself on the back for having realistic expectations, and not pushing myself to do something rediculous. 

//2. I could give a shit less about valenties day.  Your stupid heart themed breakfast pics, your pink and red god damn EVERYWHERE.. Seriously. I’m over it. Is it Halloween yet?

3// I’ve had my tax return money ear marked for months now on a new wardrobe, salon day, and just plain day of fun.. I hate that i’m going to have to be responsible with like 99% of what we get back, and not blow it on rediculous shit like a Yankee Candle shopping blow out or bejeweled underwear.. Also. my liquor cabinet could really use some revamping..



  thats it for now.. but maybe later this week i’ll get around to posting all those other posts that have been in the “draft” stage for weeks. Did i mention i am a HUGE procrastinator!?

Acorn squash soup

Well, I promised a little cooking to go with my rambling so i’ll start with this. An easy winter meal to keep you warm during these wicked New England winters. Simple. delicious, and oh my god its even good for you. 

Acorn squash soup. I love sqush. Any kind really. Butternut. Summer. Zuccinni. Winter. And yes. Acorn. I love acorn squash because its a little easier to work with than Butternut sqash and has a very similar flavor, though it tends to be a bit on the sweeter side. 

This soup is so easy, with very little prep, high in antoxidants, and low in calories.

1 acorn squash
2 cups chicken (or vegetable) broth. homemade prefferably.
Olive oil for roasting
Salt and pepper
Curry powder (optional, but really, it’s good. try it)
 A squidge (yes that’s a technical term) of sour cream, or lowfat greek yogurt.
Dash of cayanne pepper

start by slicing open the acorn squash and scooping out the seeds and set them aside (great for roasting and garnishing)
Pre-heat the over to 375. 
Place the 2 halves of squash in a baking dish with an inch of water in the bottom (to help prevent drying out)
Drizzle with squash with olive oil, salt and pepper
roast squash for about 25-30minutes or until they are fork tender.

In the last 10-12 minutes of cooking. spread seeds on a baking sheet, dust with salt and pepper. The should come out at the same time as the squash and be a dark golden brown. Keep an eye on them though. they cook a little quicker than pumpkin seeds. 

Once cooled, Scoop the squash out of the shell and add to a blender, ninja, majic bullet,  what ever kind of blending device you have. Add your broth of choice, squidge of sour cream or greek yogurt, S&P, dash of cayenne pepper (to taste) paprika and about a palmful of curry powder. Blend until smooth and serve! 

 I garnished mine with the toasted seeds and a dash more of paprika on top. WHOMP it was gone before i even had time to breathe. YUM. 

behind the bump.

Okay. I’ll start by saying that I didn’t have the picturesque pregnancy that you see on t.v, movies and more often than not “mommy blogs” Spotlighting Little baby so-and-so and her perfect little outfits with absolutely zero grape juice stains or cracker crumbs. (okay, i’ll stop being so bitter.)


Point is.. It’s so easy to get carried away in this crazy internet world sometimes, that we forget we’re  human. Life isn’t a
commercial. My house doesn’t look like a page out of Better Homes and Gardens, or American Baby magazine,  I don’t shop at H&M or the Gap and i have no idea how to make you the perfect DIY matching mother and baby outfits.. but i get by.  What I can say is this:  life is messy, and i kind of like it that way.


 Also. Pregnancy more often than not fails to compare to a page in a magazine. You might not look how  you think you’re “supposed to look” and even more shocking, what everyone failed to mention to me was You might not feel the way you’re supposed to feel.  I’m sick to death of seeing it portrayed so damn one-sided.  If i had taken weekly “bump pics” they’d have me holding a sign over my ridiculous belly that said “what the F$%! is happening to me!?”


From the get-go nothing really went the way i had imagined it. Lots of people, as well as a doctor told us it could (and probably would) take up to six months to get pregnant. Well. We were misinformed. After one month of actively trying, those two little lines showed up. Clear as day.  No. I’m not bragging to those who are reproductively challenged, Just saying. We thought we had more time.

I think I wandered around for a few weeks in disbelief. This can’t be real.  And no matter how much we wanted it, no matter how long i dreamed about what it would be like, I still was in the mindset that pregnancy just couldn’t happen to me. 


In the beginning culinary school was taking up most of my time.The day i found out i was pregnant was also the day i landed a full-time job as a cook in a restaurant.  That meant six-hour mornings in a kitchen, as well as eight or nine hours in a different kitchen in the afternoon. I was in first trimester hell and doing it all while smelling like a spicy kielbasa.  It was messy. The hours were long and the breaks were few and far between. On top of that, i couldn’t stand the smell of meat cooking, and damn did i want a beer.

By the end of the day I had seen my husband for a grand total of an hour before we were both asleep. His long hours on top of my long hours made for a very strained relationship. I felt gipped. I was going to be putting my body through this kind of madness, and I can’t even pretend to enjoy it.  No being pampered or taken care of. No begging hubby for a Hershey bar at 1am. nada. Isn’t that supposed to be the enjoyable part of pregnancy?


Around four months I had called it quits from school and switched jobs. The hours were shorter and I got a chance to rest a bit more, but life is incredibly lonely for a 20-something with absolutely no friends to speak of and the limitations of pregnancy. Hubs still wasn’t home until very late in the evening and only had 1 day off per week(if he was lucky). Lonely.


I also kept waiting for that super maternal feeling to kick in too. Rather than feeling like super mom-to-be i felt more like a host to an alien parasite most of the time. There were no cute pinterest inspired maternity and family photos. There was no registry. There was no baby shower. No girlfriends to go shopping with and a husband who was more or less gone my entire pregnancy. I felt like i was robbed of the whole pregnancy experience. And then this happened..


Don’t get me wrong, there were moments and even days where i felt super connected and extremely excited but a lot of the time i just felt completely separate from this little baby I was growing. I didn’t quite feel the love yet.  She also didn’t have a name. I’m sure that  was an important factor.  I was so afraid that I wasn’t going to love her when she finally arrived. I wasn’t sure I even wanted to be a Mom any more and boy did I need a beer.

Now. Here I am, months later, Still in a haze of disbelief, mixed up with sleep deprivation and a healthy dose of spit up and drool..
I don’t think there was anything that really could have prepared me for what i was in store. The hours are long. The pay sucks. I’m still a little lonely, and trying to wrap my head around the whirl wind of events that have taken place… But the kid’s pretty cool. I kinda like her. And at least now I can have that damn beer. 

and in order to stay sane, i just have to keep telling myself this…


chianti and cara-mocha-nut.

Okay, so i’m a little late on the weekend post, but oh well.

this weekend was a little boring and there weren’t any magical culinary creations but sometimes you just need to sit back, grab a couple snacks and forget about cooking for a while.

Friday was low key. popped open a bottle of chianti, hubs did some project for work online, while i played with the baby and then Super Mario Galaxy for wii. This shit’s glamorous


Saturday morning we went out to breakfast as per tradition. Disappointed in the diner we tred, we’ll definitely be going back to our usual next weekend, oh well. They can’t all be winners. We wandered around the other end of town for a bit checking out a few kitchy little shops and antique stores. We even  stopped in a cute little coffee shop before heading home.
I think we’re secretly an old retitred couple…

Cara-mocha-nut latte. He’s a little fancy.


Poor puppy wanted to go out and play. Just waiting for this bitter cold to be over. Soon enough, pup. soon enough.


Sunday on our way to go grocery shopping we stopped at good will to drop off some odds and ends, and because it was sunday there was a heap of things waiting to be picked up outside monday morning. Scored stole this lovely gem in almost perfect condition for B’s room. It’s a little plain but it’ll be my next project to take it from boring to beautiful. Can’t wait. Any ideas?


 Sunday dinner was no frills and low key as well.. More wine. Some Killians Irish Red and a cheese plate. I could eat like the every day, I swear. We sat around organizing the bins upon bins of baby clothes and even cleaned a little, so damn glamorous.

Clearly all this excitement was just too much for them to handle. Tucked out and ready for bed.

love them.


Hopefully some more exciting things are on the horizon..